Yesterday I chased a bike thief down my block.
Let me begin my story. I was home sitting on the couch watching some awful afternoon TV movie when I noticed outside my window someone in the yard next door. Then I noticed the fellow reaching over the fence. My first thought was that he was putting trash in my recycle bin. Then I remembered I moved the bin to stop people from throwing trash in it. Second thought was ‘is this guy stealing my tomatoes?’ And in an instant I realized he wasn’t aiming for my tomatoes, the bastard had his hands on my roommate’s piece of shyte bike.
I screamed stop kept screaming as I grabbed my keys and headed to open the door and stop him. By the time I got the gate door open the thief was two doors down and had just fallen off the bike leaving it on the sidewalk. He ran down the block and just turned the corner heading towards New Jersey Avenue when I realized I was looking at a man on foot and not a man on bike. I was still yelling at the top of my lungs as I debated for two seconds about unlocking my bike, chasing him and trying to play bicycle thief polo with his head and my u-locks. But I chose to grab my roommate’s bike and put the stupid thing back in the yard.
I then did what my roommate should have done. I locked the bike in a way that makes it ‘harder’ to just lift and ride off with, I locked the rear wheel to the frame. I used one of my locks, and moved my bike inside as it was without it’s normal 3 locks. Then I called the roommate and relayed what just happened and fussed.
The almost stolen bike is a piece of crap, which should have been its own anti-theft device. But it is a device that cannot work alone it needs a lock. A properly locked lock. It would have helped it said bike was locked to the fence, which it was not. Short of that it would have helped a lot if said lock was locked to a wheel, which it was not. Instead a newish $35 Kryptonite lock was locked to the frame and nothing else.
Where it was on the frame may have made biking on it difficult, making for a harder ‘quick’ get away. Add to the fact the bike is heavy and only one speed and no hand brakes, running on foot may have been better if you want to get away from an angry black woman.
So kids, when you lock your bike, look at before you turn your back and ask, can someone lift it and ride away? I got 3 locks, so the answer is, not unless they throw it in the back of a truck.